Verse 1:<\/p>\n
If you see me when I’m with my best mates, You might wonder if we’re even friends
\nCoz all we do is argue, trade insults, and make jokes at one another’s expense
\nBut we don’t mean to cause offence, even though that might be the appearance
\nIt’s just the way that we are with each other, where the C-word is a term of endearment
\nSome people think it’s a British thing, and that we’re too repressed to express our feelings
\nBut I disagree – we could get all along, but taking the piss is so much more appealing
\nThe irony is that the closer we are, the harsher the jokes and remarks that we’re making
\nSo if I just smile and ask how you are – chances are that good you’re just an acquaintance
\nThe worst thing about friends like these is when you introduce two from different groups
\n– Coz the only thing that they’ve got in common is a mutual love of abusing you
\nAnd you might think this just refers to the men, but trust me the girls can be even worse than them
\nAnd tryna fight back is not even worth it, coz when they get together then you can’t get a word in
\nSometimes I wonder what it might be like, if all my friends were just nice and supportive
\nI tried to make some new friends like this, but after about 5 minutes I was bored stiff
\nYou see that’s just my sense of humour, and I’m drawn to people who are just the same
\nBesides if you asked all my friends who the worst one out of us was, they would say my name<\/p>\n
Chorus x 2:<\/p>\n
If you meet us then you\u2019ll see, that we are true friends indeed
\nBut trust me with friends like these, you do not need enemies<\/p>\n
Verse 2:<\/p>\n
Yo, I learnt the hard way not to leave Facebook logged in on my lunch break
\nCoz there\u2019s a constant battle that\u2019s waged to see who can create the worst status update
\nIt all started when my orientation was changed one day to say that I\u2019d be outed\u2026
\nAnd I didn\u2019t know til my mum phoned me to say \u201cWell done son, we\u2019ve always known about it\u201d
\nAnd these days when I go to parties, I pace myself and don\u2019t drink so fast now
\nNot because I’m more sensible, but coz my friends all draw on my face when I pass out
\nI’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve woken up in the morning covered in graffiti
\nAnd sometimes I’ve not even known until I’m walking home and other people see me
\nBut at least when I go to bars and try to meet some girls my friends are there to help me
\nI’m like “Bruv I’ve forgotten her name, go over and ask her, come back and tell me”
\nI get the name and start to chat, but in 5 seconds flat the girl is leaving
\nI’m like “What, was it something I said?”, look back at my friends and see them all creasing
\nBut I’d be lying if I tried to pretend to be innocent and didn’t give as good as I get
\nAnd I don’t wait to retaliate coz it’s a fact that attack is the best form of defence
\nAnd sometimes we get carried away, with the things that we say and it can go too far
\nBut at the end of the day it’s all fun and games, we’re all mates and we know that we mean no harm<\/p>\n
Chorus x 4:<\/p>\n
If you meet us then you\u2019ll see, that we are true friends indeed
\nBut trust me with friends like these, you do not need enemies<\/p>\n
Some people love it while other people hate it, some people get it while other’s think we’re sadists
\nThere’s only one rule though – if you’re gonna dish it out, then please make sure that you’re able to take it
\nDon’t start something and then get upset, when the other person responds with a comeback
\nBe a good sport and lose with grace and don\u2019t get bent out of shape over a mum gag
\nCoz it’s all just playful fun, hurting feelings is not the intention
\n– So please don’t take it personally, coz it’s meant as a genuine sign of affection
\nBut even I can get it wrong sometimes, I’ve often said things and lived to regret them
\n“I was only joking, please don’t cry – of course I don’t think that you’re actually pregnant!”<\/p>\n
Sometimes I wonder how I got like this, but I was raised in a certain way
\nBy parents who were both windup merchants, so I was trained from an early age
\nIn our house humour ruled supreme, and a result it was valued highly
\nAnd just like turkey on Boxing Day, it was served in abundance, cold and dryly
\nAnd when I took my girlfriend to meet my rents, I said \u201cWell what d\u2019you think?\u201d when she went to the loo
\nAnd independently, both identically said \u201cShe\u2019s great, what the hell\u2019s she doing with you?\u201d
\nSo I blame them for my harsh nature, brutal humour and cruel pranks
\nCoz they made me the sarcy, sharp-tongued, smart-arse man that I am and for that I say thanks!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Verse 1: If you see me when I’m with my best mates, You might wonder if we’re even friends Coz all we do is argue, trade insults, and make jokes at one another’s expense But we don’t mean to cause offence, even though that might be the appearance It’s just the way that we are […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[19],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/iamoffbeat.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/240"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/iamoffbeat.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/iamoffbeat.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/iamoffbeat.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/iamoffbeat.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=240"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/iamoffbeat.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/240\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/iamoffbeat.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=240"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/iamoffbeat.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=240"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/iamoffbeat.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=240"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}