Chorus<\/p>\n
Welcome to the gym come take a wander with me
\nThere\u2019s a few of the members that I want you to meet
\nAnd if you\u2019re wondering where it is you\u2019ve seen em before
\nIt\u2019s in every other gym that you\u2019ve probably been<\/p>\n
Verse 1<\/p>\n
Every gym I\u2019ve been to contains the same characters
\nI swear it\u2019s like somewhere there\u2019s a manufacturer
\nWith the same personality types they\u2019re pumping out
\nLet\u2019s start off with the loud guy who likes to grunt and shout
\nYou\u2019ll never need ask anyone \u201cwhere\u2019d he go\u201d
\nIf you can\u2019t see him – don\u2019t worry coz he\u2019ll let you know
\nAnd usually if there\u2019s a weight that you need
\nYou can find it in the huge pile lying by his feet
\nAnd over here we have the Gym Bro who conforms
\nTo a strict code and wears the same uniform
\nBackwards cap? Check. Chewing gum? Check.
\nLadies crop top? \u201cNah man it\u2019s a vest!\u201d (Sure)
\nThis guy spends so much time on his phone
\nI genuinely want to know do you even lift bro?
\nAnd if checking your reflection counted as reps
\nThen by now he\u2019d be bigger than the Mountain I bet (Yep)<\/p>\n
Chorus<\/p>\n
Welcome to the gym come take a wander with me
\nThere\u2019s a few of the members that I want you to meet
\nAnd if you\u2019re wondering where it is you\u2019ve seen em before
\nIt\u2019s in every other gym that you\u2019ve probably been<\/p>\n
Verse 2<\/p>\n
But yo do you know who my favourite gym guy type is?
\nThe dude who\u2019s going through the mid life crisis
\nAnd clearly hasn\u2019t been to the gym for a few years
\nSo rocks up dressed from head to toe in all new gear
\nHe\u2019s got the sweat pants the vest and the headband
\nEven his water bottle\u2019s emblazoned with the best brand
\nHe\u2019s dressed like an athlete running a race
\nBut then he does a couple stretches and is done for the day
\nBut it\u2019s not just the guys who act stereotypical
\nThere\u2019s plenty women who are just as predictable
\nWho turn up with their hair and their make up fresh
\nBut don\u2019t work too hard coz they don\u2019t want to break a sweat
\nBut I\u2019m a hypocrite coz I think this chick is fit
\nAnd when she walks past I suck my gut in a bit
\nAnd even when I\u2019m knackered if she\u2019s stood next to me
\nI can always bust out a couple extra reps it seems<\/p>\n
Chorus<\/p>\n
Welcome to the gym come take a wander with me
\nThere\u2019s a few of the members that I want you to meet
\nAnd if you\u2019re wondering where it is you\u2019ve seen em before
\nIt\u2019s in every other gym that you\u2019ve probably been<\/p>\n
Verse 3<\/p>\n
Trainer: But Offbeat, what about the guy who just stands there people watching\u2026
\nMe: Uhh what?
\nTrainer: You know the guy taking down notes so he can make fun of them in a song
\nMe: Oh that, that\u2019s different\u2026<\/p>\n
Let\u2019s not forget the sleazy dude who\u2019s always creeping through
\nOn the lookout for girls to be speaking to
\nDropping weak compliments like \u201cNice hair\u201d
\nSeemingly unaware their boyfriend\u2019s stood right there
\nMaybe they know and just don\u2019t care
\nEither way it\u2019s fair to say he didn\u2019t come to train he just came to stare
\nAll day long at these women\u2019s butts
\nIn fact weights are the only thing he doesn\u2019t plan on picking up
\nThen there\u2019s the perfect stranger
\nWho\u2019s read one copy of Men\u2019s Health and now thinks he\u2019s a Personal Trainer
\nQuick to comment on your form and all the parts that\u2019s wrong
\nGiving you advice regardless if you asked or not
\nBut then he doesn\u2019t see his own faults
\nWhich is why you should take what he says with a big grain of salt
\nYou can find him by the squat rack
\nTelling guys \u201cNot bad, but next time try lifting with your back\u201d<\/p>\n
Chorus<\/p>\n
Welcome to the gym come take a wander with me
\nThere\u2019s a few of the members that I want you to meet
\nAnd you\u2019re wondering where it is you\u2019ve seen em before
\nIt\u2019s in every other gym that you\u2019ve probably been<\/p>\n
Welcome to the gym thanks for booking the tour
\nNow you know who you need to be looking out for
\n– So next time you go there see if you can spot some
\nIt won\u2019t be hard coz every gym\u2019s got one<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Chorus Welcome to the gym come take a wander with me There\u2019s a few of the members that I want you to meet And if you\u2019re wondering where it is you\u2019ve seen em before It\u2019s in every other gym that you\u2019ve probably been Verse 1 Every gym I\u2019ve been to contains the same characters I […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[23],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/iamoffbeat.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/288"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/iamoffbeat.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/iamoffbeat.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/iamoffbeat.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/iamoffbeat.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=288"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/iamoffbeat.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/288\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/iamoffbeat.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=288"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/iamoffbeat.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=288"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/iamoffbeat.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=288"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}