Offbeat

You know, a lot of people say they like my music
Because it isn’t all guns and bitches and hoes
But they’ll never know the pain
Of growing up as a Hip Hop fan
In the most un-ghetto place in the entire world

Verse 1

Long before the days of Spotify and Tidal
Ice-T, Snoop and Dre were all my idols
I wanted to be just like ‘em, that was my main ambition
The only issue was I had nothing in common with ‘em
Coz I grew up on the nice side, the Sunday Times side
Staying alive was no problem
I wanted to be like NWA
But I wasn’t even coming Straight Outta Easter Compton
But, I didn’t let that stop me adopting the lifestyle
Baggy jeans, tees and caps
In my FUBU vest that went down to my knees
From my weekly shopping sprees at TK Maxx, coz
We didn’t have Ebay back then
So it was either that or a trip to the market
To buy a fake Wu Tang fleece that was next to the socks
That said “Hike” with the bar on the H that was slanted

Chorus

Yeah It’s hard growing up as a kid in the sticks
When all you wanna be is a boy in the hood
With the low-rider cars and the girls in their bras
Yeah you’d go in a heartbeat if only you could

Yeah it’s hard growing up as a kid in the sticks
When all you wanna be is a boy in the hood
With a big gold chain, maybe even a cane
With ice on your wrist and Timbs on each foot

Verse 2

But even though I dressed like Ali G
To my dismay the Five O weren’t harassing me
I would say “Fuck the Police” but not understand why
Coz there was only one guy who was actually alright
And the only time that he did interfere
Was when we were 16 in the park drinking beer
And not the 40oz we’d hear in the songs
It was the little Bier Do’rs that were 4% strong…
I’d see other drinks that these rappers were popping
Like Tanqueray, Alize and Hpnotiq
But the only offy in town was an Oddbins
And the dude confused when I asked if they stocked it
So I found my mum’s booze and I robbed it
And as for weed, it was far from the chronic
So I’d be rolling down the street smoking soap bar
Sipping on Gin and Tonic

I must’ve looked so moronic like… oh my god, hahaha

Chorus

It’s hard growing up as a kid in the sticks
When all you wanna be is a boy in the hood
Talking in slang as you hang with your gang
And knowing you’ll finally be understood

Yeah it’s hard growing up as a kid in the sticks
When all you wanna be is a boy in the hood
With your fingers entwined to make intricate signs
And you know what they mean coz you’ve seen them in books

Verse 3

As soon as I could I moved out from my rents’
But I still like to pop by now and again, and
Even though made me frown as a kid
I appreciate it now for the quaint little town that it is
But it still makes me laugh when I drive past
And see the next generation of try hards
Staring at me like an OAP, while
They recite bars of their favourite grime stars
I started this wanksta shit…
And this the muthafuckin thanks I get?
I was playing music on the bus back when
The only phone you had then was a 3210
But now I’ve been round the planet a bit, and
Seen how harsh the reality is
Now I wouldn’t be in such a hurry to swap
Coz I realise now just how lucky I was

Chorus

It’s hard growing up as a kid in the sticks
When all you wanna be is a boy in the hood
Where you’re always aware of what colours you wear
Because you can get shot if you’ve got the wrong look (Uhh what?)

Yeah It’s hard growing up as a kid in the sticks
When all you wanna be is a boy in the hood
Where employments is rare but there’s drugs everywhere
So regular people are forced to be crooks (Well that’s shit…)

Yeah it’s hard growing up as a kid in the sticks
When all you wanna be is a boy in the hood
Dreaming of housing projects instead
Of these picturesque scenes of the trees and the woods (Now hang on a minute…)

Yeah it’s hard growing up as a kid in the sticks
When all you wanna be is a boy in the hood
Waving goodbye to your comfortable life
(Y’know on second thoughts maybe I’ll just stay put)

But it’s hard.

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